Who has time to be bored? Not me!

Today was not really an art day. I diddled around with the Gimp for about an hour, then my writing muse slapped me upside my head. I have written six articles for my blog today about all kinds of things:

• Impeaching Trump 
• Chicago and Music being in my bones
• A bit about a portmanteued proverb I love 
• One about nicotine addiction
• One about god, or the idea of god, or whatever
• And this one, which only kind of counts

It was a productive day.

I really am an eclectic freak. Playing uke and recorder, doing digital art and zentangle and making jewelry, and writing from my gut. Between all that, I talk to people, make new friends, share a gazillion memes, play computer games, and more. And when I go to bed, I read for at least an hour before turning out the light.

I don't have time to be bored. Considering that I'm basically housebound and can't really leave my bedroom due to the difficulty involved in hauling my carcass from room to room, my life is incredibly rich and full.

I am a very fortunate old crone.

If There Is a God, Explain This

I have started to wonder if maybe I believe in something bigger than me. Not in the churchy, hymn and halo way, but in the quiet, exhausted way you reach for a blanket when the world feels too sharp. Sometimes the idea of a god is comforting. Not because I am convinced, but because the alternative is feeling like I am free falling through a universe that does not care if I land...

The Cravings Never Really End

Nicotine Is Insidious.

I just spent five stupid minutes going full tornado, ripping through my desk like I was searching for state secrets. Lifting papers, opening drawers, rifling like a woman possessed.

Looking for my fucking cigarettes.

My cigarettes.

I quit smoking two years and five weeks ago.  

There is no nicotine in this house.  

There has not been for a long damn time.

And yet my brain still tried to run the old script:  

"Quick! Check under that pile of junk mail! Maybe Past You stashed a pack for Future You, like some deranged nicotine Easter Bunny!"

D'OH.

Nicotine is a sneaky little bastard. It shows up at the weirdest moments, taps you on the shoulder, and whispers, "Hey... remember how good we were together?" 

And I swear, for about ten seconds, or ten minutes depending on how stressed I am, I would absolutely throw hands for a smoke.

But here is the thing:  

I am not losing this fight.  

Not today, not ever.
Never fucking EVER!

Cigarettes are banned from this house like cursed artifacts. My brother, who still smokes, has to keep his pack in the car and trek a hundred feet to the designated exile chair. That is the rule. That is the boundary. That is how I keep myself safe.

I am stealing a line from my friend and webqueen, Maggie:  

I am not an ex smoker.  

I am a smoker in recovery.

And recovery is a permanent condition, but so is my stubbornness.

Nicotine can try me, but it is not getting back in. Fuck that.

Proverbs and Portmanteaus

 

Years ago, I intentionally combined two sayings into one portmanteau proverb:

If wishes were fishes, then beggars would ride.

A combo of "If wishes were fishes we'd all cast nets", and "If wishes were horses then beggars would ride".

I say it a lot, so much so that my kids use it frequently.

Chicago: Where the Music Took Hold - TWICE

I am willing to bet good money that the first music I ever heard was my mother singing to me in Chicago, the city where I was born and where I lived for the first three months of my life before we moved to Boston. 

The year I was eleven, life went pretty cattywumpus. I'd been living with my mother for the previous year, and that pretty much imploded due to my special needs as an undiagnosed bipolar person. I returned to my father's home, and since he was in the middle of relocating across town and setting up housekeeping, he asked his mom, my Gramma Mary, if I could come to Chicago and stay with her for a month or two. Gramma said yes...

Impeach and CONVICT Trump NOW!

 

There is a point where a country either wakes up or sleepwalks straight off a cliff. People keep acting like this is just another news cycle, another round of political noise,or another thing to scroll past on the way to cat videos and dinner plans. But this isn't background static. This is the fire alarm blaring at full volume while half the country pretends it's a ringtone. We're living inside an emergency, and the refusal to name it is part of the emergency.

Because this is not about one moment, one headline, or one outrageous quote. It's an accumulation, a pattern, the relentless grinding erosion of guardrails and basic expectations of leadership. Every time something crosses a line, the line gets redrawn a little further out, and people shrug a little harder, and the whole thing becomes a little more normal and accepted...

The Board of "Peace" and The Threat of War

I read an article in The Guardian about how Trump sits at the head of something he is calling the “Board of Peace” and somehow manages to threaten Iran with “bad things” if they do not fall in line within ten days. Ten days. Like he is handing out a goddam eviction notice instead of talking about potential military action. He says the talks have been “good,” as if that word magically cancels out the threat hanging off the end of his sentence like a loaded weapon.

So there he is, perched on his shiny new “Board of Peace,” casually dangling the possibility of war like it's a fucking party favor. Peace, apparently, now means “do what I fucking say or I will blow your shit up.” Peace means smiling for the cameras while you rattle sabers under the table. Peace means pretending diplomacy is happening while you count down to violence like it is a goddam game show.

The fucking absurdity is so thick you could spread it on toast...

The Dogs Who Built My Life - A Poem

Connor in front, Romeo behind

I was raised in a house where dogs

were not pets but storylines.

Flockie, fierce little guardian,

patrolling the borders of childhood.

Ollie, the Wonder Dog,

half giant, half myth,

all heart,

the one who walked beside me

like he had been assigned the job by the universe.

Heidi, wild and bright,

a fugitive with sheep’s wool on her breath

and summers in Nova Scotia in her bones.

Gunther, the one puppy miracle,

proof that even small dogs

can write big legends.

And then came the ones who shaped

the in between years,

the ones who carried me forward

when life shifted under my feet.

Lulu, my heart dog,

the little dachshund who loved me

with a devotion that left a hollow

when she was gone.

Her absence was a wound

I did not know how to close

until Romeo arrived

and stitched it gently,

one heartbeat at a time.

Murphy, the tiny poodle

with the soul of a knight,

who lived twenty one long years

and would have taken a bullet for me

without hesitation.

I loved him,

but not the way he loved me,

and that truth still tugs at me

like a thread I never tied off.

Sid Vicious,

whose name was a lie

and whose only violence

was the ferocity of his fetch obsession.

A dog who believed joy

was something you chased

and brought back proudly

again and again.

And now, the pack that fills my home

and my days

and the spaces I did not know

were still empty.

Romeo, my heart dog,

the one who looks at me

like he remembers every lifetime

we have ever shared.

Cubby, my little buddy,

joy wrapped in fur,

a shadow with a wagging tail.

Connor, my sweet and fragile boy,

who learned safety in my hands

and taught me softness in return.

Rocco, borrowed but belonging,

folded into the pack

as naturally as breath.

These dogs,

past and present,

are the chapters of my life.

They shaped me,

held me,

trusted me,

and taught me what loyalty feels like

when it curls up beside you

and falls asleep.

I did not just grow up with dogs.

I was raised by them.

And I am still being raised

every day

by the ones who walk beside me now.

Not Bob: The Orange Cat Who Thinks He’s a Dog

 

Not Bob isn’t just a cat. He’s a phenomenon in orange fur, a walking burst of confidence and questionable decisions who somehow manages to charm every creature in the house. He talks constantly, a running commentary of meow, meOW, MEOW that sounds less like a request and more like a declaration of his own importance. And the dogs believe him. Romeo drags him across the room by the scruff like a beloved plush toy, and Not Bob just goes limp with the blissful trust of someone who has never once considered the possibility of danger. He lets the dogs groom him, shove him, nudge him, and he returns the favor by inserting himself into every canine moment like he was born into the pack. He isn’t a guest in the dog world. He’s a citizen. Maybe even a diplomat.

The little beast has one, POSSIBLY two, brain cells...

His hobbies include locking himself in the bathroom by pushing the door shut, then immediately complaining at full volume until someone rescues him. He also has a long‑running feud with the floor vents. Not Bob has pulled them up, chewed through tape, defeated glue, and ignored every deterrent except bricks, which he is not yet strong enough to move. He would absolutely appreciate a set of weights for his birthday so he can train for the day he reclaims access to the heat‑duct underworld.

There’s no dignity in him, no hesitation, no fear. Just pure, unfiltered orange cat energy wrapped around a heart that believes every creature is a friend. In a house full of dogs and stories and history, Not Bob has somehow carved out his own legend simply by being exactly who he is: loud, fearless, affectionate, and absolutely convinced he belongs everywhere.

How the FUCK Are MAGA Followers Still Worshipping This Guy?

 

At this point, trying to understand MAGA loyalty feels like trying to explain why a goddam raccoon keeps coming back to the same dumpster fire. You’d think eventually the smell of burning garbage and shit would register. But no, they’re still there, still digging, still convinced they’ve found treasure while the rest of us are fucking gagging.

Because honestly, how in fuck do you keep supporting someone after everything that’s come out? We’re talking about a man with multiple criminal convictions, a man who’s been at the center of more lawsuits than a defective chainsaw company, a man who is all over the Epstein files (and probably guilty of pedophilia), a man whose public behavior would get any normal person fired, shunned, or at least politely escorted out of the building. But not him. No, he’s their golden calf with a spray tan and a microphone...

Time for a living wage, dammit!

On July 24, 2009 the federal minimum wage was elevated by congress, raising the rate to $7.25 per hour. This remains the current federal minimum as of early 2026. This is the longest period in U.S. history without a congressional update. This is egregious neglect and abuse of the workers and needs to be addressed.

Key details regarding the federal minimum wage:

* Duration: The $7.25 rate has been in place for over 16 years.

* Purchasing Power: The value of the minimum wage has declined significantly due to inflation, losing roughly 30% or more of its purchasing power since 2009.

* State vs. Federal: While the federal rate is stagnant, many states have implemented higher minimum wages. 

(The previous bullet list was pasted from Google.)

Texas, however does not give a hot fuck. Minimum wage here and in 19 other states is $7.25. And in Texas, if you're a tipped worker, such as a waitress or waiter, you get a whopping $2.13 an hour.

To put that into perspective, in 1982, FORTY-FOUR years ago, I was hired for my first job, waitressing in Massachusetts, where the tipped wage was $2.10 per hour. And it was not enough to live well or comfortably on. Things have NOT improved since then.

Three cents an hour. That's how much more per hour this fucked up state is paying its tipped workers in 2026 than I earned in 1982.

LIVING WAGE NOW, MOTHERFUCKERS!

FUCK Cancer! Fuck It In The EAR! I’m DONE Watching This Monster Hurt People I Love

Cancer is the one motherfucker that never clocks out. It doesn’t care how good you are, how careful you’ve been, how much you’ve already survived. It just shows up like a goddam wrecking ball and dares you to pretend this is normal. I’m fucking sick of it. I’m sick of watching people I love get blindsided by a piece of shit disease that feels like it’s everywhere, all the time, creeping into every family like some kind of outrageous cosmic joke.

We talk about cancer like it’s a statistic, like it’s a chart, like it’s a ribbon color. But when it hits your circle, it’s not a number, it’s a gut punch. It’s fear. It’s rage. It’s the helplessness of knowing that even with all our medical advances of the last motherfucking century, all our research, all our awareness campaigns, this thing still keeps taking swings at the people who deserve it the least.

And I’m tired. Tired of pretending to be calm. Tired of acting like this is just part of life. Tired of watching strong, brilliant, irreplaceable people get dragged into a fight they never fucking asked for...

Missing and/or Kidnapped - THEY MATTER TOO!

Look, I feel awful about Nancy Guthrie, I really do. No 84 year old woman (or anybody else for that matter) should be abducted.

But let's get real. Hundreds of women and men and children get abducted or go missing every single year in this country, and for the most part, we don't hear dick about them.

Here's a few missing just this year alone, and it's only mid-February:

• Virginia Parker (Reno, Nevada): 17-year-old missing since January 23, 2026.
• Cherell Brooks (New Castle, Delaware): 32-year-old missing since February 5, 2026.
• Ianna Geniyah Mondesir (Virginia): Missing since February 9, 2026, also 17 years old.
• Kara Hynd (Ohio):  Missing as of February 8, 2026.
• Sophia Barajas (California): 15 years old, missing as of January 11, 2026.
• Mara Minott: (Michigan): Missing since November 2025.

The thing MOST of these missing women and girls have in common? All but one of them is Black or Latina. And none of them are the mother or daughter of a celebrity.

Don't they matter?

Don't they?

Reblog - Scott Stanton, On Calling Pedophiles To Account

You may or may not have seen some posts pop up and or disappear from me about recent activity regarding the Epstein files and child predators. To be honest, I’m having a difficult time being completely rational about it because as a child between the ages of five and seven I was repeatedly raped by a neighbor. What these men in the Epstein files did to these children isn’t something to brush aside or forget about. I can testify from firsthand experience that this kind of shit ruins people’s lives for a long, long time. These women need you to listen to what they have to say about what happened to them at the hands of these powerful men.

This is not a little bit of oops I did something with somebody I shouldn’t have type of thing. This is they raped children, and the children they raped have been suffering their entire lives because of what happened to them at the hands of these men. I don’t wanna hear anymore about how we need to let this slide because the economy will falter. I don’t wanna hear anything else about how people’s lives are going to be ruined because people’s lives have already been ruined. These children have already been suffering for decades with no one to hear them and no one to listen and no one knowing what happened. If the entire system has to collapse to bring these rapists to justice, I’m completely fine with that and so should you be. Any system that supports the raping of children and defend the rapists who did that is a system that needs to collapse.  Full stop. Raping children is never OK. Getting away with raping children is never OK. I don’t care what has to collapse. I don’t care what has to catch fire and I don’t care what has to happen to other people’s lives because of this. 

These children deserve to be heard. There was no one there to hear me when I needed my voice to be heard. Now these girls have a voice as the grown women they have become. You must listen to them. You must look into their eyes as they weep and tell you what these men did to them. You must hold their rapists accountable for raping them. I can’t believe I’m even having to type that sentence to justify holding rapists accountable for the rape they perpetrated. This should not be up for discussion, ever. This should not be something people are confused about.

Every single person on the list must be trotted out into the light of day and examined, regardless of their political party, regardless of their power and influence in the world, and regardless of what consequences there will be for them and for the world after they are brought to justice.  We need lots of trials. We need lots of consequences. I can no longer get justice for myself, but goddamnit we are gonna get justice for these children.

If you defend in any way, these men, including our president, you are a disgusting, horrible person. There’s no other explanation for why you would defend someone who raped a child much less many many children over many years. This is not something I will bend on. This is not something that I’m willing to debate. It is not up for discussion or debate.

These men deserve to be tortured for what they did, but unfortunately, in this country torture isn’t an option. Sadly, the best we can do legally is to hold them accountable and put them in prison. I think that’s a good start. After that, I hope our beloved inmates do what they usually do to child rapists and remove these lumps of human garbage from our planet.

I said what I said, and I stand by every single word of this. 

Autism Test

I took a detailed online autism test at https://personality.co/, though I HAVE been officially diagnosed by my shrink. Here's my results. They're interesting:

Very High Autism Traits

This score suggests that you exhibit very high traits associated with autism, which likely have a strong and consistent impact on your daily life. Individuals in this range often experience significant challenges in social interactions, sensory processing, and adapting to change, but also possess highly specialized skills, intense focus, and strong pattern recognition abilities. You may find that certain environments feel overwhelming, that social communication requires conscious effort, or that routine and predictability are essential to your well-being. While these traits may present difficulties, they also offer unique strengths—many people with very high autism traits excel in areas requiring logic, precision, and deep analytical thinking. By recognizing your needs, preferences, and strengths, you can create a life that accommodates your challenges while emphasizing your natural talents.

Self Awareness:

Understanding Your Score

Your score suggests that autism-related characteristics strongly influence how you think, feel, and interact with the world. You may:

• Struggle significantly with social interactions, requiring direct communication and clear expectations.

• Rely heavily on routine and predictability, finding change or unexpected situations very stressful.

• Experience heightened sensory sensitivities, with strong reactions to noise, light, textures, or certain environments.

• Have intense, specialized interests, often dedicating large amounts of time to specific topics.

Understanding these traits allows you to develop strategies that reduce discomfort while maximizing your abilities.

Your Social Perception

Social situations may feel challenging, confusing, or overwhelming. You may:

• Struggle with nonverbal communication, including body language, eye contact, and tone of voice.

• Prefer structured conversations where expectations and topics are clearly defined.

• Find social norms difficult to understand, leading to misunderstandings.

• Avoid certain social situations due to sensory overload or difficulty processing interactions.

Because of this, you may feel more comfortable engaging with others in controlled settings, online interactions, or one-on-one discussions about shared interests.

Your Cognitive Flexibility

You likely rely on structure, patterns, and familiarity to feel comfortable in daily life. You may:

• Need strict routines to feel grounded, becoming distressed if they are disrupted.

• Find multitasking or sudden changes very challenging, requiring extra time to process transitions.

• Struggle with ambiguity, preferring clear, black-and-white rules.

• Excel in areas where precision and consistency are required, such as technical fields, research, or logic-based problem-solving.

While change can be difficult, creating structured coping strategies can help make transitions more manageable.

Conclusion

Your score in the Very High Autism Traits range suggests that autism-related characteristics strongly shape your experiences, influencing social interactions, sensory processing, and cognitive preferences. While challenges may be present, you also possess valuable strengths such as deep focus, logical reasoning, and strong pattern recognition. By understanding what environments, routines, and communication styles work best for you, you can build a fulfilling life that embraces both your needs and your talents

Emotional Intelligence:

Your Empathy and Social Understanding

Your experience of emotions may differ from neurotypical individuals. You likely:

• Experience emotions deeply but struggle to express them in conventional ways.

• Have a strong sense of justice and fairness, valuing honesty above social expectations.

• Find it difficult to interpret others’ emotions unless they are clearly stated.

• Prefer logical discussions over emotionally-driven conversations.

While your way of processing emotions may be different, it does not mean you lack empathy—it simply means you express and interpret emotions uniquely.

Your Comfort in Social Situations

Social settings may feel mentally and emotionally draining, making structured interactions preferable. You may:

• Struggle to follow group conversations, especially when multiple people are speaking.

• Prefer nonverbal or text-based communication to reduce processing demands.

• Feel isolated or misunderstood, even in social settings where you want to connect.

• Need recovery time after social interactions, as they may feel exhausting.

By identifying communication styles that work best for you, you can create meaningful relationships while minimizing social fatigue.

Interpersonal skills:

Your Interpersonal Relationships

You likely value deep and meaningful connections, even if forming relationships is challenging. You may:

• Have a small but trusted circle of friends rather than a wide social network.

• Prefer relationships based on shared interests rather than emotional bonding alone.

• Struggle with reading between the lines, needing direct and clear communication.

• Have difficulty recognizing unspoken expectations, sometimes leading to misunderstandings.

Despite these challenges, you are likely a loyal and devoted friend, partner, or family member, especially when others understand and respect your communication preferences.

Leadership Qualities:

Your Professional Life

Your strengths may align with specialized, technical, or highly structured careers. You likely:

• Excel in areas requiring deep concentration, logic, and precision.

• Prefer independent work or working in small, familiar teams.

• Need clear expectations, guidelines, and structure to perform at your best.

• Find social aspects of work (meetings, networking) challenging but manageable with preparation.

These traits make you highly suited for careers that emphasize expertise and structured problem-solving.

Your Handling of Power and Authority

In leadership or work environments, you may:

• Prefer roles where expertise is valued over social influence.

• Struggle with office politics but excel in structured decision-making.

• Need clarity in expectations and responsibilities to feel comfortable in leadership roles.

• Lead through precision, organization, and technical skills rather than charisma.

By focusing on clear communication and structured professional environments, you can find leadership styles that align with your strengths.

Problem Solving:

Your Decision-Making and Problem-Solving Skills

You likely approach problems methodically and with intense focus. You may:

• Prefer solving logical, fact-based problems over abstract or emotional ones.

• Take extra time to analyze all possible outcomes before making a decision.

• Excel in recognizing patterns and details that others might miss.

• Struggle with uncertainty or rapid decision-making in unpredictable situations.

These problem-solving skills make you a valuable asset in fields requiring deep analysis, strategy, and structured thinking.

Your Communication Style

Your communication is likely direct, logical, and detailed, which can be an asset in some settings but challenging in others. You may:

• Prefer factual, straightforward discussions over small talk or vague conversations.

• Struggle with implied meanings, sarcasm, or indirect language.

• Find it easier to express thoughts in writing rather than verbally.

• Prefer highly structured conversations rather than spontaneous interactions.

These traits make you an effective communicator in structured, detail-oriented settings but may require adjustments in social or professional environments where ambiguity is common.