Do you need my kidney?

I have several best friends. These are the women and men that I am absolutely closest to and would swim nekkid with...

Not Bob, the cat who thinks he's a dog

 

This orange jerk has abandoned me. He used to sleep on my pillow every night. Then my best friend Patti moved in, and Not Bob was all "OMG I WUBS HER!"...

Ollie the Wonder Dog

 

I would like to tell you about my second dog, Ollie.

We got Ollie in 1971, when I was 7 years old. (I am sixty now, not that that is relevant). He was an 8 month old St Bernard/Old English Sheepdog mix, white and charcoal grey, and just gorgeous...

It can't happen here, right?

 

Dementia Don Strikes Again!

Dementia Don, speaking to the Navy. He's so fucking brain damaged. Click the read more to see this shit in its full glory. This senile old fuck has the nuclear codes, folks!

Pain Free! Suck it!

Three nights of rock solid sleep.

Two ibuprofen. Two tylenol. One teaspoon of Kratom mixed in 1/4 cup chocolate milk. Compression gloves and wrist braces. This all adds up to GOOD sleep!

I wake up pain free, too, which has not happened in years...

Oh MAN this song KICKS!

 

Ban books, ban guns, ban apps and television 

Ban protest, ban sex and ban religion 

Ban drugs, ban love, ban being alive 

Ban them if they look at you a way you don’t like

My Vegemite Initiation

I wrote this many MANY years ago about the sticky black salty ambrosia called Vegemite. I reproduce it here for your enjoyment. Brace yourself, it's gonna get weird!...

More on Vegemite, just because!

I fucking LOVE Vegemite.

It's thick, viscous, salty, and kind of musty tasting, and it positively REEKS of yeast. You do not GROW to like it, you either do or you don't. There is positively no middle ground. You love it or you despise it. Period. Nobody has EVER said, "Well, when it comes to Vegemite, I can take it or leave it!"...

Ah-Huh, Donnie. Sure you did.

From Yahoo News:

"Jackson, during a press conference at the White House in 2018, told reporters that Trump “has incredibly good genes, and it’s just the way God made him. I told the president that if he had a healthier diet over the last 20 years he might live to be 200 years old.”...