I have been unable to get one of my psych meds prescribed for some reason. my shrink can't do it and neither can my PCP. I'm pretty sure that it's a controlled substance.
Anyways, I have been very stable and doing well, so I think I'll stop trying to get the scrip written. If I start having symptoms, I'll take buspar for a few days until it mellows out. That's what I did this last time, and it worked well, although I was kind of a zombie while I was taking it every 6 hours. But it was only a few days, and then I felt even again and stopped the tranquilizer...
I'm doing well, mentally. And that's a fucking relief. I hate feeling unbalanced and out of control of my thoughts and actions and words. HATE it.
Being borderline and bipolar can be a real mindfuck sometimes. I do not recommend it to anybody!
Sam is getting me zentangle gear for Christmas, and some colored pencils and adult coloring books. All of that really helps mellow my thoughts and calm me when I'm cycling between manic and depressed, and when I'm being borderline as fuck. It's great therapy, so that's what I asked him for.
So he's getting me that, along with a greatest hits collection spanning Eric Clapton's entire career so far. Clapton is an antivax asshole and something of a racist prick, but his music makes me feel really good. It's medicine for me. So I told Sam to buy it used, so we're not putting money in the pocket of a shit human being.
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